Tuesday, February 25, 2014

What does it mean to say "I do"?

What does it mean to say “I Do”?
By Abriana Cantaffa

What exactly does “I do” mean? I am talking about the two words that will tie you to a person until “death do you part” or otherwise.
In colonial America arranged marriages were not uncommon, but what did marriage mean for the woman? The law of coverture basically says that once a women is married her legal rights are subsumed by her husbands. The women could also not own her own property, own wages, sign a contract, testify in court, or own a business[1]. Only some couples married for love, they were mainly lower and middle class couples. The others had to consider financial alliance and property, they did not have the privilege of “love”. Who knows, maybe some came to love their husband or wife.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif3GMy8rtwsvpw2CIfmdN1xOKCazf77xnRMz7ycX0elwn47CB8rOu6FHAiDs6JF6uMNmbURscq0e-fVAQKfvdsvlSGEFjz7kJi7sR8x0OgYdo5_YY30QX1vpuNo0VKqgJcd_erQW_j52g/s1600/pamela_marriage_lg.jpg

As time went on things changed, courting went from public to private. So what changed in marriage as time went on? Nothing good! Sex within a marriage was not just considered a duty anymore, it was forced even if the women was ill, pregnant or even worse having a difficult pregnancy[2].
Marriage in the 20th century is so much different than before. Dating became the new thing instead of courting. Dating consisted of going out away from the family, like to a restaurant. Fast forward a few years and marriage is everything, it is something that had basically become mandatory. As time passes and women become more independent and many, many things change socially marriage is not something that is expected as much. Today, marriage is the, for lack of a better word, ultimate way to express your love for another person. Today people are fighting to get married to the person that they love and want to spend their life with, such as gay and lesbian couples.[3]

http://mattdelarosby.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Husband1.jpg

With all of that being said, are women still treated the same way in marriage? Are they giving up their rights? We know that it is not the same. The roles of women in society have changed. Women can own their own property, make their own money, and sign whatever they want to sign, testify and have their own businesses. This brings up another topic. Do men treat women the same way that they were treated tons of years earlier? Are women still viewed as property?





[1] Moore, Crystal. “Sex in Colonial America”. Lecture. February 14, 2014
[2] Moore, Crystal. “Sexuality within the Victorian Family”. Lecture February 25, 2014
[3] Staff, PT. "Marriage, a History." Psychology Today, May 1, 2005. http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200505/marriage-history (accessed February 25, 2014).

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